Hard To Write

This post is going to be hard for me to write. *deep breath* Okay, well I had my audition..... It went okay. (I'm forcing myself to be positive even though I want to say it was one of the worst things that's happened to me) Anyway, let me explain what happened. What had happened was, I forced my self to smile, though part of the time I forgot. I didn't remember when to start. I skipped over a whole section of the song. I sang one part too early. After I stepped off, I went to my friend and leaned on her shoulder while she gave me a half-hug and I tried to keep from crying. There's something that really gets me about coming off as a weak little kid. (how I'm assuming I looked to people watching)I'm already an incoming freshman and I already look weak and helpless. Just awesome! You know what's awful? Having people feeling bad for you. People kept coming up to me saying, "you did great!" I usually said thanks but once I said, "No not really but that's okay" I don't need people to feel bad for me. I can handle myself. But, if anyone thinks that this is going to stop me from auditioning for the fall play, they'd be dead wrong. Ha. The song I'm listening to just said, "bad things happen for a reason" AMEN. So, I'm going to audition for the fall play. (I don't have to sing) And, not only will I audition, but I will prove that I'm not weak. I'm strong. I can handle myself. I can do great and don't need anyone to feel bad for me. If you're wondering why this is so important to me, it's because I'm extremely worried all the time what people think about me and I seriously hate it when people think anything bad. Like I'm weak. Wish me luck! :)

Love,
   Me